CrazyTown

Epic Fail.

You know how sometimes, all you want is for people to like you, and then you go out of your way to get people to like you, but they still don’t? And then you do even more to get them to like you, but they act like assholes and still don’t like you? But then you try so hard that you screw yourself over trying to get them to like you, and they STILL DON’T LIKE YOU??!

Well, I’ve had that week. I offer to take extra shifts. I spend two hours doing nothing but running other servers’ food and drinks. Hell, I made all the drinks that I ran. I gave them pens. I cleaned their theaters. And yet, come cashout, I get a “Verbal Warning” from my manager about not helping the other servers out around the theater.

I’m sorry you asshats didn’t see me helping you. I guess you were too busy eating dinner to notice me cleaning your theaters for you. And you must have been too busy flirting with your tables to notice me running your drinks and your food. But I don’t have any excuse for you to not have noticed me making the drinks. Also, you should consider returning my pens sometime, if I never help you out. And that trainee you were supposed to be in charge of two weeks ago? I spent more time with him than you did. And I know you noticed me coming up to you with your customer’s requests. I could just tell the customers to fuck off, you know. They aren’t my tables. Instead I go out of my way to track you down, including figuring out every single theater you might be in and asking every other employee to tell you something for your tables.

But I guess that’s not enough. After all, I suppose I do spend too much time talking to my tables. I mean, they actually remember my name when they leave. They remember my name well enough to ask for me to take their orders when they come back, even if I’m not working. Having repeat customers must be a bad thing, especially since you’re supposed to be the better server, since you’ve been doing it longer. I shouldn’t have such loyal customers if you don’t. So I’m not helping out enough, I guess.

Fuck you bitches. Seriously.

Quick little survey…

Three questions my campus paper put out about SOPA.

SURVEY

Have you read more than 6 of these books? The BBC believes most people will have read only 6 of the 100 books listed here…

Bold those books you’ve read in their entirety.

Italicize the ones you started but didn’t finish or read only an excerpt.

1 Pride and Prejudice – Jane Austen
2 The Lord of the Rings – JRR Tolkien
3 Jane Eyre – Charlotte Bronte
4 Harry Potter series
5 To Kill a Mockingbird – Harper Lee
6 The Bible
7 Wuthering Heights – Emily Bronte
8 Nineteen Eighty Four – George Orwell
9 His Dark Materials – Philip Pullman
10 Great Expectations – Charles Dickens
11 Little Women – Louisa M Alcott
12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles – Thomas Hardy
13 Catch 22 – Joseph Heller
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare
15 Rebecca – Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit – JRR Tolkien
17 Birdsong – Sebastian Faulks
18 Catcher in the Rye – JD Salinger
19 The Time Traveller’s Wife – Audrey Niffenegger
20 Middlemarch – George Eliot
21 Gone With The Wind – Margaret Mitchell
22 The Great Gatsby – F Scott Fitzgerald
23 Bleak House – Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace – Leo Tolstoy
25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – Douglas Adams
26 Brideshead Revisited – Evelyn Waugh
27 Crime and Punishment – Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 Grapes of Wrath – John Steinbeck
29 Alice in Wonderland – Lewis Carroll
30 The Wind in the Willows – Kenneth Grahame
31 Anna Karenina – Leo Tolstoy
32 David Copperfield – Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia – CS Lewis
34 Emma – Jane Austen
35 Persuasion – Jane Austen
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe – CS Lewis
37 The Kite Runner – Khaled Hosseini
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin – Louis De Bernieres
39 Memoirs of a Geisha – Arthur Golden
40 Winnie the Pooh – AA Milne
41 Animal Farm – George Orwell
42 The Da Vinci Code – Dan Brown
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude – Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney – John Irving
45 The Woman in White – Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables – LM Montgomery
47 Far From The Madding Crowd – Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid’s Tale – Margaret Atwood
49 Lord of the Flies – William Golding
50 Atonement – Ian McEwan
51 Life of Pi – Yann Martel
52 Dune – Frank Herbert
53 Cold Comfort Farm – Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility – Jane Austen
55 A Suitable Boy – Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind – Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities – Charles Dickens
58 Brave New World – Aldous Huxley
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time – Mark Haddon
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera – Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men – John Steinbeck
62 Lolita – Vladimir Nabokov
63 The Secret History – Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones – Alice Sebold
65 Count of Monte Cristo – Alexandre Dumas

66 On The Road – Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure – Thomas Hardy

68 Bridget Jones’s Diary – Helen Fielding
69 Midnight’s Children – Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick – Herman Melville
71 Oliver Twist – Charles Dickens
72 Dracula – Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden – Frances Hodgson Burnett
74 Notes From A Small Island – Bill Bryson
75 Ulysses – James Joyce
76 The Bell Jar – Sylvia Plath
77 Swallows and Amazons – Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal – Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair – William Makepeace Thackeray
80 Possession – AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol – Charles Dickens
82 Cloud Atlas – David Mitchel
83 The Color Purple – Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day – Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary – Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance – Rohinton Mistry
87 Charlotte’s Web – EB White
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven – Mitch Albom
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes – Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection – Enid Blyton
91 Heart of Darkness – Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince – Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93 The Wasp Factory – Iain Banks
94 Watership Down – Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces – John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice – Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers – Alexandre Dumas
98 Hamlet – William Shakespeare
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory – Roald Dahl
100 Les Miserables – Victor Hugo

I just picked out the ones I had read completely. 5 times more than the average person…

1. 1 Pride and Prejudice – Jane Austen
2. 2 The Lord of the Rings – JRR Tolkien
3. 3 Jane Eyre – Charlotte Bronte
4. 4 Harry Potter series
5. 5 To Kill a Mockingbird – Harper Lee
6. 7 Wuthering Heights – Emily Bronte
7. 8 Nineteen Eighty Four – George Orwell
8. 9 His Dark Materials – Philip Pullman
9. 11 Little Women – Louisa M Alcott
10. 16 The Hobbit – JRR Tolkien
11. 21 Gone With The Wind – Margaret Mitchell
12. 22 The Great Gatsby – F Scott Fitzgerald
13. 25 The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy – Douglas Adams
14. 29 Alice in Wonderland – Lewis Carroll
15. 33 Chronicles of Narnia – CS Lewis
16. 36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe – CS Lewis
17. 42 The Da Vinci Code – Dan Brown
18. 43 One Hundred Years of Solitude – Gabriel Garcia Marquez
19. 45 The Woman in White – Wilkie Collins
20. 58 Brave New World – Aldous Huxley
21. 59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time – Mark Haddon
22. 61 Of Mice and Men – John Steinbeck
23. 64 The Lovely Bones – Alice Sebold
24. 72 Dracula – Bram Stoker
25. 73 The Secret Garden – Frances Hodgson Burnett
26. 81 A Christmas Carol – Charles Dickens
27. 87 Charlotte’s Web – EB White
28. 88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven – Mitch Albom
29. 97 The Three Musketeers – Alexandre Dumas
30. 98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare

(Source: khareen, via klates)